I’m taking a quick break from what has turned out to be a never ending porch renovation to bring up how annoyed I get when people complain about what their “friends” post on Facebook. You don’t like pictures of my kid? DELETE ME. If you don’t know me well enough to care I had a baby then I don’t know you well enough to even notice I’ve been unfriended. Don’t want to hear about your old college roommate’s sister’s engagement? DELETE HER. I guarantee it won’t ruin her happiness right now. If I get tired of reading “OMG I got so wasted last night!!1!1!” stories from people who still think they’re 21, guess what I’ll do? DELETE THEM. My 50-something year old mom only took a week to figure out that the best way to stop seeing forty bazillion posts about how to rearrange her karma from an elementary school classmate was to DELETE HER. Done and done.

If pictures or updates about people’s major life events (graduations, engagements, weddings, babies) make you feel annoyed, maybe it’s time to get off the computer and adopt a pet. Only don’t start posting pictures of your cute new kitten because I’m sure there’s someone out there who thinks that’s totally, like, LAME.

I realize Facebook started as a networking site for college students, but once they stopped requiring a school email address all the rules for what “should” be posted went out the window. Why are pictures of people in funny hats deemed ok? How come no one ever complains about all the blurry drunken photos of someone falling off a curb? Should pictures of fabulous beach vacations be banned because they make me jealous?

I don’t do “Top 5” posts. I don’t take “Which Breakfast Club character are you?” quizzes. I don’t update my status 14 times a day with everything I eat, think or see. I don’t even publish my pictures in a photo stream most of the time. So if the thing I post about most happens to be Baby Evan, so be it. No one is forcing you to say “Oh how cute!” or “I love your baby!” or “Nom nom nom!” and if you want to sit on your couch and laugh at how funny looking he is I WILL NEVER KNOW. Go ahead and mock, I’m happy to give you a few minutes of laughter.

Stop wasting time complaining about such a non-issue when it could be used on something much more important. Like how to stop that guy you know from band camp from posting so many pictures of mostly naked Anime characters.

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