The good news: My baby is totally and completely healthy. He’s gained 14 oz in 10 days, which the pediatrician said is “spectacular”. This is just normal baby spit-up, not projectile vomit or a sign of an illness (although the cat he just threw up ON might disagree). Baby has healthy lungs (the better to scream at you with), a healthy stomach (the better to hold the puke with) and healthy bowels (the better to crap himself with). There are no signs that he has any sort of allergy and the chances of my milk being the problem are minuscule. The doctor said giving up any foods – even dairy – is unnecessary.

The bad news: Baby Evan is going to keep puking. There’s no way to stop it. His problem is purely mechanical – the muscle that holds food in his stomach is too weak to do its job. It happens with almost every baby. Eventually it gets stronger and the spit-up stops. I’ve got to keep reminding myself that although I can no longer remember what NOT having a baby feels like, Evan is still less than 6 weeks old. He went from two cells to a whole baby in only 9 months – I need to give him a little time to adjust to the big wide world. I just wish there was a countdown for HOW much time it’s going to take. I can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel – because the tunnel is full of BARF.