Which came first: The horrible cold that led to puking, cramps and frequent runs for the bathroom OR puking, cramps and frequent runs for the bathroom as a sign of early labor, leaving a 9 month pregnant woman tied to her couch and stopwatch, time contractions instead of sleeping?

Ok, so maybe not the oldest question.

As a public service announcement for all pregnant women, please take note. If you are sick – even just a little sick, like coughing or a running nose or a symptom that’s kind of annoying but wouldn’t cause an otherwise healthy person to take a day off or skip a party – STAY THE EFF AWAY. My body is already dealing with one 8 lb parasite, it doesn’t need millions of tiny ones running amok. Thanks bunches.

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