One of the thing I’ve completely failed at during this pregnancy is sleeping on my left side. I wake up every morning flat on my back, terrified I have given my baby brain damage or cut off circulation to a limb or two. But the only other comfortable position is to sort of lie on my stomach, which somehow seems much worse. I don’t want to give birth to a Flat Stanley because I was too lazy to buy a body pillow to prop my stomach up. Plus when I lie on my stomach the baby gets all pissed off and rolls around kicking and wiggling to make me move. Sometimes I lie on him on purpose, just to make sure he’s still paying attention.

I actually looked it up this morning – to make sure I wasn’t REALLY squashing my baby – and the answer was “Sleep however the heck you want”. Not even a word about the super-dangerous back sleeping.

Bonus baby info: The baby doesn’t really kick the way you imagine kicking. Other people described it like having butterflies in your stomach, but I waited and waited for butterflies and didn’t get any. When my baby moves, it feels like missing a step on the stairs or going over a hill on a roller coaster. The big movements take me by surprise every time.