So I know this post was days ago and I know no one was trying to insult me and I know I should probably think about something else – like how to get the new cat to stop pooping under the radiator or where the heck my husband is – but I’m incapable of dropping things. On Tuesday, Dodai posted a story on Jezebel about how she’s sick of hearing about “baby bumps” (Warning: profanity). I understood her opinion to be mostly about celebrities babies, because none of us know those kids, or will ever meet those kids, or will ever buy those kids birthday presents, so who cares? But some of the commenters expanded the idea to be about ANYTHING baby related. A couple people complained about their friend’s Facebook updates. To quote one of them:

“I don’t care about your morning sickness, your ultrasound looks like a blob, and the tummy photo updates are annoying (every week!!!!), not cute.”

One of the reasons I’m writing about my pregnancy in blog format is so I don’t annoy the crap out of people who are uninterested. It is possible to be friends with me and NOT hear about my uterus. I bet I even have friends who still don’t even know I’m pregnant. THAT BEING SAID, having a child is a huge deal for the person doing it. It consumes all your thoughts for most of your waking hours. You cannot escape your own body or how your body feels or all the crazy things your body is doing. But if I want to publish pictures of my belly on Facebook or let the people who really do care how my latest ultrasound went know, then you can just SHOVE IT baby-hater. Facebook is meant to be a huge waste of time where people can keep their friends informed of everytinydetail of their lives. These are some of the things my friends currently have as their statuses (statusi?):
__________ is on vacation!
 _________had her Vietnamese sandwich fix. All is well once again.
_________is pleasantly surprised by her whole-wheat, angel hair pasta. It totally doesn’t taste like cardboard at all.
__________ could not be more excited about her 200+ channels of DirectTV with DVR if she tried! Kiss my ass, Comcast!
__________ doubts your commitment to Sparkle Motion.

Obviously, all those are vitally important and non-annoying.