Happy Anniversary E! I can’t believe we’ve been married for four whole years. It seems like only yesterday I was watching you across that dance hall, hoping you’d stop hitting on the slutty waitress long enough to take me home and get me drunk. You’re the best husband a girl could ask for and I love you even more today than on our wedding day.

p.s. Thanks for the flowers. I’m sorry I didn’t get you anything, I sort of figured carrying your child for 9 months pretty much covered the next dozen gift-giving occasions. XOXO